What Depression And Anxiety Feels Like
To my dear readers,
Ever wonder what depression and anxiety feels like for someone who suffers with it? Do you sit back and watch what happens to someone you love and care about sink into a dark hole, and never have the courage to break free of that tight cage? Or is it you that suffer from the two notable mental illness?
To quote one of my favourite tv characters Haley James Scott-
I just tell myself to be happy. But I don't feel happy. And when I try to change it, when I try to remember what being happy felt like, I can't. ... I just feel numb
That my dear friends, is exactly what depression feels like. I know I'm not some therapist and I can't really diagnose who has the mental illness. But what I can tell you is- that for the past four years, I have been living with both depression and anxiety. And let me tell you, it is not fun.
As a person who lives with this everyday, trust me it's never really easy. Sometimes it hits me when I least expect it, and sometimes it's me who is the reason why I feel that dark cloud.
Not only do I have my parents expectations to graduate from college, but they also want me to be successful. I mean, our parents love us, but what they don't know is that we may be already pushing ourselves harsh too. I mean look at me; when I was in high school I expected to get every grade a high 90% or even an A. And when I got a B I doubted my intelligence and bullied myself to do better. Not only that, but I wanted (and still to be an author) so I actually pushed myself everyday with 4-6 hours of studying and homework, and then writing.
Sometimes I wouldn't even let myself eat so I would complete my expectations. That led to anorexia and more pressure, and medication. (But that's a different story, for another time)
My point is so many people have been suffering in silence or in public with depression and anxiety, that people expect us to be happy from one thing.
NO, THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!
I mean some people overcome their depression and anxiety that they don't need to take medication anymore- (or maybe they do- cause I'm not a doctor) They can move on with their next goals in life.
However, some people like me , still live with it every single day and night. Depression doesn't automatically go away, you have to try as well.
So that's where my personal advice comes in;
Ever wonder what depression and anxiety feels like for someone who suffers with it? Do you sit back and watch what happens to someone you love and care about sink into a dark hole, and never have the courage to break free of that tight cage? Or is it you that suffer from the two notable mental illness?
To quote one of my favourite tv characters Haley James Scott-
I just tell myself to be happy. But I don't feel happy. And when I try to change it, when I try to remember what being happy felt like, I can't. ... I just feel numb
That my dear friends, is exactly what depression feels like. I know I'm not some therapist and I can't really diagnose who has the mental illness. But what I can tell you is- that for the past four years, I have been living with both depression and anxiety. And let me tell you, it is not fun.
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Depression can hit us all
As a person who lives with this everyday, trust me it's never really easy. Sometimes it hits me when I least expect it, and sometimes it's me who is the reason why I feel that dark cloud.
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We are our worst nightmare
"We are our worst enemies!"
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Recognize the quote? Good. That is the truth is, we are. Sometimes we put so much pressure on ourselves that we make ourselves feel worse than we already are. Well, at least for me.Not only do I have my parents expectations to graduate from college, but they also want me to be successful. I mean, our parents love us, but what they don't know is that we may be already pushing ourselves harsh too. I mean look at me; when I was in high school I expected to get every grade a high 90% or even an A. And when I got a B I doubted my intelligence and bullied myself to do better. Not only that, but I wanted (and still to be an author) so I actually pushed myself everyday with 4-6 hours of studying and homework, and then writing.
Sometimes I wouldn't even let myself eat so I would complete my expectations. That led to anorexia and more pressure, and medication. (But that's a different story, for another time)
My point is so many people have been suffering in silence or in public with depression and anxiety, that people expect us to be happy from one thing.
NO, THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!
How To Overcome Depression
I mean some people overcome their depression and anxiety that they don't need to take medication anymore- (or maybe they do- cause I'm not a doctor) They can move on with their next goals in life.
However, some people like me , still live with it every single day and night. Depression doesn't automatically go away, you have to try as well.
So that's where my personal advice comes in;
How To Overcome Depression II
- Relax- You have to come to your own terms, and be happy when you're ready. If that's from taking it easy from school or a job, do it. (Remember, your life and well being is more important than education and money).
During my senior year of high school I became super depressed when the school days were soon coming to an end. It was right before prom and I realized I was going to miss High School so much because I was so used to it. That's when I knew I would soon be out of my comfort zone when college arrived. So I talked to my guidance councillor, and he personally recommended a few days to myself, and to do what I enjoyed in order for me to become myself agaim- so that's where step 2 comes in.
2. Do the things you enjoy- All the things that make you who you are are your habits and passions as well as hobbies. Do what you enjoy so you can become the person you are and want to be.
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what you enjoy represents the things that make you, you
A lot of my friends and family know how I make myself happy is by doing the things I enjoy the most. Personally, I love to wake up in the morning and grab myself a cup of freshly made coffee as well as check in on my emails and social media. Afterwards, I do what is necessary for college, and then I take breaks. Recently, I started writing a new novel on Wattpad that really makes who I am. My Wattpad Novel
Other things that I enjoy are reading (either books or fanfiction) make YouTube edits of all my favourite fandoms, and then lastly- binge watch tv. I live for doing everything, learning new things, and enjoying new world in books, movies, and tv.
Usually when I'm upset I do one or more of these things to make me get out of that dark place that my inner voice receptively tells me that's who I am.
In general, you can't get rid of depression and anxiety overnight. It takes time, and effort. I would recommend going to a therapist, or even write in a journal to express your inner feelings. If that doesn't work for you, then just do whatever makes you happy. Like I said, do your hobbies, do your daily routine- that's my way of living with Depression and Anxiety.
It also helps that I have so many people that care for me, and make me motivated to keep on fighting. To not feel so alone that the only thing to get rid of that feeling is by cutting and attempting suicide.
Hey, If people can kick cancer's butt, we can keep on fighting. But that's really up to one person, and one person only: YOU!
Sincerely, WritersJournal&WJ
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